Fess Up Friday

Fess Up Friday, because it's been too long and I'm sitting around waiting for an appointment...
- One of our chairs is tied to the table leg because that's how strongly we feel about chairs constantly being pushed into the kitchen.
- I laugh (inside) when Ezra says "uh uh" (which means no) when asked to give a kiss/go to bed/pick up toys/say a word. I guess he's practicing his decision making.
- I frequently yell excitedly about passing cars and trucks before realizing the boys aren't in the car
- I feel like i should buy stock in stain removers
- If the boys wake up happy and chatting in their room I leave them in there until it changes because...happy! Contained! Mostly quiet!
- I say some variation of "boys stop" about 60 times a day...BOYS, stop. BOYS, STOP. Boys, STOP! Stop, boys. STOP! BOYS! I probably even say it in my sleep. (They do get better at playing together eventually, right?)

Fess Up Friday

I didn't believe Cohen when he said "pee on mommy". I won't make that mistake again.

Sometimes I get dressed in the kitchen and then I throw my pajamas in the dryer so I don't have to take them all the way to the bedroom and risk waking Ezra up.

I stay up way too late at night only because it's quiet.

This week, I heard myself say "Give mommy the hairball"

My baby is 5 months old and it took everything in me not to cry when I realized it.

Fess Up Friday

You know how htey say if your baby's crying is too much you should put them down and walk away? I use that with my 2 year old as well.

Cohen has had a cold so I have been putting a bib on him simply for the purpose of using it to wipe his nose. Built in kleenex!

Danny and I have been on a health food kick and last night we laid in bed talking and drooling about all the things we wanted to eat...pizza...garlic bread...a package of oreos.

I get really irritated when people post pictures of their kids sitting and playing. Of course there's no telling how long they actually cooperated, but I'm jealous anyway.

Last night I got in bed, loudly exclaimed that it was Danny's favorite time of year and then put my frozen hands and feet on him.

Fess Up Friday

One night at dinner I didn't have a napkin so I used Cohen's bib. While he was wearing it.


While playing in the yard, Cohen was overheard saying "stupid kitty". We'll never know where he learned that.

I accused my coworker of not doing all her work until she pointed out that she had done her work and that I didn't know what day it was. I never know what day it is.

I put a teeny, tiny pair of little boy undies on Cohen, not because he's potty trained, but because I thought they were adorable.

Cohen has been very interested in the potty so we got him a movie about it at the library. He LOVES it and it's really short so it usually plays a few times before we turn it off. The songs get stuck in my head and I actually heard myself sing "the potty song" out loud at work. 

Fess Up Friday

I like to weave my way through the parking lot on my way back to my car. That way I confuse people and they can't follow me and sit there and wait for me to get my 2 children and the groceries in the car.

Danny stayed home with the boys for the first time this week. When I got home nothing was on fire, no one was screaming, and the house was clean. I accused him of having my mom come over and clean it. I'm still suspicious.

I have been dairy free for over a month (which is a HUGE deal for me). I was so excited to find out that mint oreos don't have dairy that I ate the whole package. And then got another one.

Cohen threw a fit when I took off his pajamas. He wouldn't stop crying until I put them back on. So we went to OT in Christmas pajamas and rainboots on a 70* day.

I can count on one hand the number of baths Ezra has had in his life.

It would take at least 4 hands to count the number of baths Cohen has had this week. 


My friend has started hosting a "Community Fess Up Friday", if you have anything you'd like to confess (come on, I know you do...) you can head over there (or post here) and leave an anonymous comment! You'll feel better after you do, I promise!

Fess Up Friday

I licked a self adhesive envelope

I also put a stamp on the left corner of the envelope

I consider my day a success when I don't get any bills in the mail

It makes me ridiculously excited when I get to the end of the day and realize Ezra is still wearing the same onesie I put on him in the morning and I haven't changed his outfit 7 times

I let Cohen take Stinky in the bathtub with him because well, why not, he needed a bath too...

I told our cat Russell to go find a new home after I found him on the table eating my lunch while I had been trying to put Ezra to sleep.

I have thrown a burp rag over barf on our bed and gone back to sleep.

Fess Up Friday

I haven't had time to blog very much, but I do have a few confessions I could share with you.

I miss my blog

I had to email my mom late last night asking her to drop off a roll of toilet paper if she came out because we were down to our last few squares and I didn't see us getting to the store before Danny got off work

I am back to considering putting on sweatpants as "getting dressed"

I mistakenly thought that babies came pre-programmed to know when to sleep and eat

I have wished for a beer many days over the last few weeks and I don't even like beer.

I hide in our computer/sewing room to eat my breakfast so I don't have to share. Even though Cohen just hangs over the gate and begs anyway.

Fess Up Friday

There is a load of laundry that has been sitting in my dryer for probably a week. I can't wear any of the clothes so I figure why bother?

Last night I ate almost an entire pineapple, 3 cups of raspberry leaf tea, bounced on an exercise ball and went for a long walk to try and entice this baby out. It didn't work.

I am so over cooking.

Yesterday I took Cohen to the bakery for a little treat and we were both sitting down eating our snacks and I realized I never paid.

I laugh every time Cohen says "butt" instead of "button"

We still haven't gotten the bassinet put back together or put the carseat in the car.

There are times after Cohen has gone to bed that I will realize I'm still watching Elmo or Nemo.

Fess Up Friday

One day I was in our living room muttering about how I shouldn't have to clean the house and pick up toys when I'm 12 months pregnant. Then I heard Danny say from the other room "You forgot the part about how I make you bike to work uphill both ways"

We have been using plastic shot glasses to teach Cohen how to drink from a cup and not have to clean up so much spillage.

When I get Cohen's jammies on at night and his feet are filthy from playing sockless in his crocs, I wipe them off with a baby wipe and put socks on and deal with it in the morning.

I accidentally wore Danny's "Proud Preemie Dad" shirt out of the house.

I haven't worn pants in over a week before they are too hard to get on. Thank goodness for skirts!!

Fess Up Friday

I have moved from Girl Scout cookies to Cadbury Creme Eggs. I spend about 20 minutes a day trying to convince Danny to get me some.

It took me three transactions to get through the grocery store in one trip. Once for the groceries. Another for the balloon for Carter I forgot I had tied to the cart. And another for the donut I was clutching in my hand, you know, so it didn't get lost.

I had to google when the third trimester started.

One day after Cohen had dumped his cereal on the floor and was signing "more" I heard myself say "Go eat the ones on the floor" 

I always thought children on leashes were ridiculous and now, I have never wanted one more.

Fess Up Friday

When I set my alarm I always set it for odd times like 6:06 so that I can get as much sleep as possible, down to the minute.

I went grocery shopping and came back out to the car and found my keys sitting in my unlocked car on the driver's seat. Good thing cars like mine aren't in high demand.

Back when I was a perfect mom, before I had kids, I would never have let my toddler watch TV. Now I think it's cute that he claps and points when Elmo shows up on Sesame Street.

I was halfway through brushing my teeth when I realized something felt off and that I was using Danny's toothbrush.

I have been dreaming of girl scout cookies and have asked everyone within a 5 mile radius where I can get them. So far I have been unsuccessful.

Fess Up Friday

Finally got around to doing a Fess Up Friday!! 

I put Cohen in the back of his Tonka dump truck and drove him around the yard and he loved it.

As I was setting my alarm, I told Danny to let me go to sleep because I was only going to get 10 hours of sleep before I had to get up. 

Cohen messed up his shirt at breakfast but instead of trying to change the tornado, I just put a new shirt over his old one.

One night I texted Danny from bed and asked him to bring me cheese and crackers because I was too hungry to sleep.

When I get in the car after Danny's been driving, I can fully extend my legs and still not reach the gas pedal and for some reason, it makes me laugh every time.

One day in Target I was explaining to Danny how I needed new headbands because I had sucked my last good one up in the vacuum cleaner on accident. Then the man turned around and it wasn't Danny, but I'm sure he enjoyed my story. 

So there you have it! Have a great weekend. In case you missed Cohen's Halloween costume on facebook, here it is.

{2011- Santa Claus}

 {2012 - Puppy dog}

Fess Up Friday

As I was going into our room, I told Danny I would be right back. I fell asleep and came back 2 hours later.

While we were out for a walk Danny asked me how far I thought I could run if I have to. I told him to the end of the block and I meant it.

I keep a pair of socks in my purse because I always wear flip flops to work and forget socks.

Aside from the being sick part, I secretly take great pleasure in sucking snot out of Cohen's nose.

We keep chips in our microwave (it's broken and we have decided to go microwave free).

I have a love/hate relationship with Pottery Barn Kids catalogs. I want everything and I can afford nothing.

I am kind of competitive when it comes to playing games. One time while playing cribbage I was laughing at with Danny and in my excitement I leaned forward and broke one of the cribbage pieces off with my head. Part of the little red piece is still stuck in the board to this day. Danny likes to bring it up every time we play.

Anytime we open the dishwasher, Cohen makes a beeline for it and likes to play in the dishes and try and climb into the dishwasher. I often use this as an excuse for why I am unable to do dishes.

Happy Friday from Farmer Cze31ohsc5v1q1aaaaaah (That means Cohen, he's just learning to type so cut him a little slack :)!!

Fess Up Friday

* I got Cohen a book from the library and I wiped it off with a Lysol wipe before letting him have it

* I wore a swimsuit cover up as a dress around the house because I didn't have any shorts I wanted to wear

* I put a load of laundry on our bed to fold, then I took a nap instead, next to the laundry.

* I wrote about the upcoming cold/flu season and how we were have to start being super careful about germs again and then the next day I got sick...

* I squished a bug in a tissue (ok, fine it was a washcloth... the bug scared me and that was the closest I could find to squish it with) and then I saved it to show Danny to make sure it wasn't a termite

* I had to ask a friend to make sure that NE stood for Nebraska

Fess Up Friday

* I voluntarily eat macaroni and cheese on a semi-regular basis

* We are currently using a bag of potatoes as a door stop

* Sometimes I run out of things to watch on Netfl1x and then I end up watching things like "Who the !%@# Did I Marry". Then when I get in bed I wake up my innocently (or is he?) sleeping husband and ask him if he's a spy, a money smuggler, or if he's going to take me on a cruise and throw me overboard.

* While calling patients on the phone, I sometimes have to guess who I am talking to..."Hi is Maryjo Soandso there? Oh she isn't? Is this her................*please give me some kind of a hint*..........husband? wife? son? neighbor? Second cousin twice removed?" They don't often willingly offer me who they are. Guessing doesn't always turn out very well.

* (Continued from above) This also applies to guessing who people are in person. "And is this your dad? Is he going to pick you up after surgery?" "Um, that's my boyfriend" Whoops.

* Cohen has a little baby doll that he is allowed to play with if we refer to it as an action figure, per Danny's request

* I posted Fess Up Friday on Thursday at 11:30 pm (yawn, close enough to Friday) because otherwise I won't have time to do it tomorrow! 

Do you have anything you would like to confess? It'll make you feel better, I promise! 

{You guys are so funny!}

Fess Up Friday

I have nothing to confess this week. Except that Danny caught me snuggling my little baby. Yep, I still snuggle him when he sleeps. Have I ever told you how much I love this boy? I do, a lot.

A few more of you have asked if you can borrow Fess Up Friday and of course you can! If you do you should leave a comment with your blog so we can read what you have to confess!

Fess Up Friday

* I wiped Cohen down with a baby wipe when I didn't have time to give him a bath. His OT told him he smelled good and asked what I used on him.

* While shopping one day I had picked up a basket of strawberries and got some juice on my hand. I didn't want to stain my light colored clothes so I wiped it on Cohen's sweatshirt (his sweatshirt was dark blue!!).

* One day when picking Cohen up from my sister's house, I let her guiltily explain the bump on Cohen's head before telling her it was there when I dropped him off.

* We have been saving our food scraps for our new pigs and at one point I texted my mom to see if they ate Doritos. They do.

* We haven't learned our lesson about naked baby time. This time he peed on his toothbrush.

* My sister told us that Cohen had said poo poo several times while she was changing his diaper. We were so excited that he was saying a new word that all day we tried to get him to say poo poo. Then we realized that that word could probably wait a little while longer.

* Sometimes, I draw the line and I don't share everything that happens. In fact, 2 things happened this week that are way too embarrassing to tell you. After yesterday's event, Danny said "do you think this is too embarrassing for Fess Up Friday?" It was a definite yes. Sorry!

Fess Up Friday - 4th of July Edition

The ultimate photo bomb. And no, he's not singing the Star Spangled Banner, he's BURPING!! Yep, just keepin' it real.

p.s. Several of you have asked if you can "borrow" Fess Up Friday and of course you can!! I don't know how to do fancy link things, but you should post a comment with your blog address so we can all read the fun :)

Fess Up Friday

* We have to weed our yard


* You know those giant forks that come with your silverware set? I have used that giant serving fork to eat my dinner on more than one occasion when all the regular forks were dirty.

* After continually telling Danny it was okay to speed on the road to my parents house because I had "never seen a police car on that road in 20-something years", he got pulled over by the state patrol. There goes that theory. But seriously, I've never seen a police car on that road in all my days. Border patrol...constantly. Police, no. He didn't get a ticket so there's really no proof that he saw one either.

* We call our kiddie gate "the shin splitter"

* We make up stories about our cat...for example:  
Danny: "What if we saw Russell out riding a bike?"
Jana: "That's ridiculous, where would Russell get a bike?"
Danny: "What do you think Russell is out doing right now?"
Jana: He's probably out playing hopscotch with his friends 

* I like watching documentaries 

* Cohen gets to have "naked baby time" at home. While on vacation we let him have some nakey time and he proceeded to not only pee on the floor but also poop. Twice.  

Fess Up Friday

* Before Cohen left the NICU we had to take a carseat class. They told us to talk to our baby in really happy voices and to smile while putting them in the carseat and then they would like it. I have been practicing this while sweeping the floor in hopes that someday Cohen will really like sweeping the floor

* I usually take Cohen out for a walk at some point in the day and I usually change out of my pajamas into my "nice" sweatpants so that I'm presentable

* There are a lot of days I can't remember when the last time I gave Cohen a bath was

* Cohen got another new tooth (that makes FIVE!) and I didn't even know about it until I saw it all the way through yesterday when I came home from work. I didn't think I'd been gone that long!

* I claim no responsibility for the things I do in my asleep or half asleep state, including kicking Danny to get him to go get Cohen on a night he had to work in the morning.

* I hate touching lunch meat and I am scared of sea creatures

* I still go in and snuggle Cohen at night while he is sleeping at the risk of waking him up. I can't help myself, he is growing up WAY too fast.
 
* I think I enjoy Cohen's giant bear as much as he does. It makes an excellent floor pillow.

* Cohen is a little spoiled well loved