Nighttime Adventures

Last night we had our first "adventure" as parents of two.

Ezra woke up around 2 am, ate and refused to go back to sleep. We walked, we bounced, we binky-ed, he was just awake. Three times he fell asleep and then popped open his little peepers the minute we laid him down. Finally, I stuck him in his boppy in between us in bed.

Just as Ezra was settling down we heard Cohen crying over the monitor. Danny got up to check on him and I could hear Cohen trying all his best reasons to get out of bed - "book", "ming" (milk),"guy" (stuffed animal) and finally "eat". He settled on eat as his best chance and repeated it over and over. So, we figured maybe he was actually hungry. We tried bringing some crackers into his room, but nope, he wanted the full eating experience. So we went out into the dining room and put him in his chair to let him eat. Then he pointed at one chair and said "mommy" and pointed at the other chair for Daddy. We were all going to sit down to eat or it didn't count.

When he decided he was done he wanted to play with his truck. By now it was 4 am and I wanted sleep. I carried his truck to his bed and told him he could play with it there. He seemed satisfied with that and we put him back in bed. Danny and I returned to our bed, with Ezra still in the boppy taking up 1/3 of the bed. We figured we would finally get some sleep until we heard Cohen's truck making noises over the monitor. He was pushing the same button over and over.

By this point we were both just laughing, because what else can you do? We had also been up for so long that I was hungry. I got up, peeled Cohen's leftover cheese off the table, ate it and went back to bed. We finally fell asleep laughing and listening to the sound of "Breaker breaker, good buddy" over the baby monitor.

Here's hoping for a nap today!!

{3 am snack} 

One Week

I can't believe it's been a whole week since this little fellow graced us with his presence. I'm pretty sure we've both been asleep for most of that week. We are still taking in the whole process of having a baby, bringing home a newborn, and introducing him to big brother.

Cohen seems to be taking it all in stride. He's been enjoying having visitors come to the house. He likes to give "baby binky" and sometimes tries to give him his cars. We've only had one eye poking event so far which I'm counting as a success.

We are still trying to decide who Ezra looks like. We've compared a few pictures to Cohen's but it's hard to tell since we didn't actually see Cohen's whole face until he was several months old. Ezra is a pretty mellow baby, but he definitely has a set of lungs when he is hungry, which is often. Our tall little fellow hardly fits in his newborn clothes, but I'm trying to squeeze him in some of them before we move up a size (!!!). It's funny to have him be too big for clothes that Cohen didn't wear until he was months old. So different.

We are mostly just hiding out at home, adjusting. Danny has been amazing and I'm so thankful for how much he has taken on so I can rest. He has a few more days off before he goes back to work, I don't know what I will do without him!!

Adjusting to Life as 4

This is all so very strange. We had a baby, and then we brought him home. I haven't had to worry about his feeding tube or whether his oxygen is still hooked up.

I can just sit here and look at my baby. And hold him when I want. And I get to stay with him at night instead of leaving. His cousins can come see him and hold him. So very strange. And completely wonderful.

I'm still working on writing down his birth story. We got a little taste of literally everything that could happen during labor, it seems. But the ending was what we wanted -- a healthy baby. And we got that and we couldn't be happier.

For now we are enjoying our destroyed house, our snuggly baby, and our rambunctious 2 year old who suddenly now seems so old but still as cute as ever. Cohen is adjusting. He got up and scowled that there was someone in his swing, but soon he was putting cars on the tray for Ezra. He has been a little bit more crazy lately, but I think he's just recovering from us being gone and now to having a little baby in his space and we already see that he is going to be a wonderful big brother.

{Sharing cars|

Ezra is Here!

Ezra Andrew was born on Thursday June 20 at 1121 pm. 8 lbs 7 oz, bigger than I was expecting! He is perfect and we are so proud of him. Exciting birth story coming soon! More pictures on Facebook (link on the right of page)

40 Weeks

40 Weeks!!!!!

Can you believe it? I can't really either. It's very strange to go from basically crossing my legs, praying against every contraction, and wishing for just one.more.day to being ready for this boy to come out. Being able to be told that it's okay to do things to encourage his arrival (they don't work). And to know that when he is born he won't (Lord willing) require numerous machines, medications, doctors and nurses just to keep him alive. 

But, what an amazing feeling. An amazingly, wonderful feeling.

Everybody asks if I'm miserable and honestly, I'm not. I'm big and I get uncomfortable, but I really am not miserable. I think what I've realized is that I was truly miserable with the boys. I was stuck in bed and I had gained 10 lbs in 2 weeks. Everything hurt. Not to mention the emotional part of it. I had visitors come and I remember just not really even being able to talk to them because I was so miserable (sorry if you came to visit me!!) Compared to that, this really isn't anything. In a week or so I may change my mind if this boy hasn't made his arrival, but right now, it really isn't that bad. 

That said, I ready to meet this fellow! The bags are packed and ready. Any time now baby :) Thank you all for your continued support, we can't tell you how much it means to us. 

Happy Father's Day!

Happy Father's Day to some wonderful dads!!

I always knew Danny was going to be a good dad, but I have been continually amazed at his strength as a dad and his capacity for loving our boys.

Obviously, the road to parenthood wasn't exactly what either of us expected but he met the challenge with wisdom and strength that I am so thankful for. I never would have made it through these last 2 years without him by my side.

Danny, you are an amazing husband and father. I wish the road could have been different, but you have walked it with amazing strength, wisdom and love. I can't wait for Ezra to get here and get to experience the love of his daddy too!

And of course Happy Father's Day to my other favorite Dad! Love you!! (Checking to see who's taller of course...)

Fess Up Friday

There is a load of laundry that has been sitting in my dryer for probably a week. I can't wear any of the clothes so I figure why bother?

Last night I ate almost an entire pineapple, 3 cups of raspberry leaf tea, bounced on an exercise ball and went for a long walk to try and entice this baby out. It didn't work.

I am so over cooking.

Yesterday I took Cohen to the bakery for a little treat and we were both sitting down eating our snacks and I realized I never paid.

I laugh every time Cohen says "butt" instead of "button"

We still haven't gotten the bassinet put back together or put the carseat in the car.

There are times after Cohen has gone to bed that I will realize I'm still watching Elmo or Nemo.

39 Weeks and Counting

I can't believe I am almost to my due date!!

I am now down to a very select few things that fit. My morning dressing routine consists of picking up one of 2 shirts that fit, looking for food etc that I may have missed the day before and then putting it back on with a pair of yoga pants. Yep, classy.

Cohen has been incredibly clingy and sensitive (and snotty) the last few days, I'm wondering if he is a)teething or b)picking up on my hormones and sensing that his life is about to change in a big way.

Cohen has had more colds in the last 3 months since he's been released from his winter isolation. Yes he's being exposed to new germs and "building immunity" but I'm glad that we could keep him from all the germs when he was younger. I don't regret our decisions at all.

I have a doctor's appointment this afternoon.

Danny and I are both stress eating, big time.

I took the bassinet apart to wash it and now I can't get it back together. I've tried everything!

Cohen and I both desperately  needed a change of pace yesterday so we jumped in the car and went to the mall (one of my least favorite places). He got to run and explore and I got a change of scenery. We also had some birthday money and Cohen got a brand spankin' new pair of jeans for probably the first time ever.

As of 3 seconds ago, Cohen has discovered that he can blow bubbles with his snot. He cried when I wiped it and kept saying "bubble". You're welcome for sharing :)

And that's our lives as of lately. Come on baby boy, we are ready to meet you!!

Two Years Old

Maternity Pictures

With the boys I never got maternity pictures. I wasn't sure it was something I wanted at first, but when we knew the possibility was high that they would be very early, I decided I wanted them. But, we never quite got around to it and now I totally regret it.

So, when my neighbor friend asked if she could take some I agreed. I am not the best subject and generally end up feeling pretty awkward, but I'm glad I did it and she was a good sport to put up with me, especially since she herself was pregnant and went into labor that night! She is pretty awesome and if you want to find her, here is her facebook page! Thanks again, Cat!!

Happy Second Birthday!

We had a pretty good day celebrating the boys' second birthday. We didn't have much planned, which was sort of intentional and kind of not, but worked out well. It happened to be Danny's day off for the week so that was really nice that we could spend time together as a family.

We hung some balloons on Cohen's bed and put some in his doorway for when he woke up and he liked seeing those when he got up. First he opened his presents, an Elmo shirt, a picture dictionary, and some playdough. He got his favorite breakfast of "eggies" and sausage. We put a birthday candle in his sausage and he mistook it for candy and ate part of it while we weren't looking.

The night before we had heard that one of Gramma's goats had her baby, so we went over to see the newest addition. Cohen was more interested in the big goat, but did try to hold the little one.

He had his playgroup that day at his OT so he and Daddy went to that and then it was home for a reading of "boom boom" his new favorite book (Chicka Chicka Boom Boom) and a nap.

After nap, we went to McDonalds for a happy meal since he had some birthday money to spend. He wasn't interested in the toys but did spend some time flirting with a little girl and trying to share his french fries with her.

We stopped by the cemetery to take Carter some balloons and flowers and spend some time there. It always seems so unfair to go to a gravesite to spend time with your little one.

Then it was time for Cohen's favorite part - the park! We spent some time on the swings, and climbing, and best of all throwing rocks in the creek. When we first got to the park, I had happened to look up for some reason and we saw a big rainbow in the sky, which seemed odd since it was sunny out. But, there it was, a big rainbow right around the sun. I'm sure there is some scientific reason it was there, but I think it was Carter saying hi to us. There were also two butterflies flying around the whole time we were there. It was nice to feel like he was there spending some time with us.

{The boys watching the two butterflies flying around}

Once we were all wiped out, we headed home for dinner. Cohen had requested a cheesecake, so I had to make it for him. You only turn two once, right? Well, he only ate the crust but we sure enjoyed it!

It was a pretty good day, with some hard moments of course, but we got to spend some good time as a family celebrating our boys.

Big Brother

The time is getting closer! One thing I am really looking forward to, is getting to see Cohen as a big brother. Right now he has no idea what's going on other than pointing at my stomach and saying "baby" once in awhile. He has no idea his entire world is about to change.

He technically is already an older brother as he was born before Carter, but this time he gets to actually be a big brother. I have a feeling there will be a lot of eye poking and trying to shield the baby from balls being thrown around. But I'm hoping as they get older they will be good friends and I can't wait to see what kind of trouble adventures they get into.

We have heard from many people that the first few years of having kids close in age are hard, but that once you get past those couple years it's really fun to see the relationships that develop. We will always miss the relationship that Carter and Cohen would have had together so we are excited to see what life will be like for Ezra and Cohen. If he loves his brother as much as Stinky, I think we'll be in pretty good shape.

{Hard to catch a moving target!}

Turning Two

In a matter of two days we are going to have a TWO year old on our hands. Yikes! Where did the time go!? It's so hard to believe that our rambunctious, curious, and slightly stubborn little boy was once an impossibly tiny little peanut fighting against the odds for his life. How incredibly thankful we are.

Honestly, I haven't been in the party planning mood. Not that the boys don't deserve to be celebrated, quite the opposite. I just can't quite get myself there. I'm 38 weeks pregnant and generally highly emotional around this time of year anyway. Danny has Wednesday off so I think we will just take time to spend as a family and see what we feel like that day. I feel somewhat guilty, but thankfully he is young and won't remember (unless he reads this someday). Mostly, I just want him to know how very much he is loved. I'm sure someday he will have a big, fancy party (or I will hire his wonderful Auntie to plan one), but this year just isn't going to be it. I think we will do something nice and quiet for Carter as well.

My boys and all the coulda, shoulda woulda's, the what ifs, and the this isn't how it was supposed to be's...they make this time of year so bittersweet. It would be so nice to have just the sweet part without the bitter, but we are so thankful for both of our boys and their time here. Cohen is the little light of my life and we will never, ever stop missing our Carter.

Farmer's Day Parade

We took Cohen to the local parade here in town. We went to the lighted Christmas parade earlier this year and he liked the lights, but I think he liked this one better. Cohen is getting to such a fun age where he is a lot more aware of what is going on around him.

{Eating apples and waiting for the parade to start} 

{Lots of tractors!}

  

 

{And big trucks}

His favorite part of course was seeing all the flags and he even got his own little flag. There is always lots of candy being thrown around and Cohen isn't quite old enough to go get it, but once someone else had it then he wanted it. Some of our friends were there and sat with us so they shared a few pieces with him and he begged a few pieces off an older kid sitting next to us too.

I was curious to see how he would do with all the loud horn honking and sirens that usually go on since he has always been so sensitive to noise. He cried one time and hid a few times, but did a lot better than I thought.

{Uh, dad...I'm not so sure about this}

{Snuggling after all the loud horns} 

Overall, I do think he enjoyed it. He had lots of fun pointing at things and eating his sucker. It was sprinkling on and off throughout but the rain managed to hold off. He was a huge, sticky mess by the end!